Your hair
Sun-bleached and strained
Brittle straw formed tangled
By sea-winds cruel
Caress your face no more
Their experience harsh
Cuts lines across your face
Ravines ravaged by Time
The most vengeful of mistresses
Eyes by sunlight reflected glare-blinded
Half hidden behind
Your wild rooted mane
The freeness of your soul now bruised
And driftwood broken
Still stares
Out beyond the shore and waves
Which merciless crash
Upon your dreams.
This was inspired by a prompt posted by Vick Linde (http://vclinde.wordpress.com/). You should check her site out if she’s unfamiliar to you.
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Your language absolutely captivates me–WOW. And thanks for the tip, will check out Vick Linde.
Thank you for your lovely comment, and for taking the time both to read and write a response. I genuinely appreciate all the feedback I receive. I’m pleased that you enjoyed this poem, and I have to say that you create some powerful imagery through your own! Take care, Chris.
Well, we all appreciate feedback on our blogs….
Time – the most unfaithful of mistresses. For me, a poem full of melancholy, and of acceptance of what time can do to our bodies and our dreams. A great poem, and thanks for the tip on Vick Linde.
Thank you for your lovely comment, Rachael, and your extremely perceptive reading of this poem – I’m pleased that you liked it. Despite everything, we have to, I believe, keep on hoping…
Whew, this is a heavy one, Chris. I love the analogy between the ocean and that cruel mistress Time. And you’ve employed some gorgeous alliteration, too:
Sun-bleached and strained
Brittle straw formed tangled
Those are lovely lines. A very poignant poem. Well done, Chris!
Didn’t mean to depress you! Time, like the ocean, does its level best to erode our desires and expectations; all we can do is keep hoping for a brighter day.
Thanks for taking the time to comment, Miranda, and I’m pleased that you enjoyed reading this.
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This is just wonderful. I really love the connection of the hyphenated words along with the waxing and waning line lengths. Plus, the line “Your wild rooted mane” is so evocative.
V.
Thanks for your comment, Vick: I’m glad that you enjoyed this poem. The inspiration from your prompt seemed to jump out at me immediately and gave me something to work with, so thanks. I look forward to the next!!